Episode 9

full
Published on:

25th Feb 2026

Ostriching, Unexplained Diagnosis & Breaking Free from Self-Blame with James Cowley

This week, we are joined by NeXYs community member James Cowley, who shares his powerful story of navigating a male factor infertility diagnosis for over four years. James opens up about the all-too-common “ostrich moment” of burying his head in the sand, the clinical and often dehumanising experience of providing a sample, and the gut-wrenching pain of failed IVF cycles.

From screaming into the ether in a field to being told by a mentor to embrace his “true, authentic, vulnerable self,” James’s journey is a masterclass in resilience. He discusses how he learned to stop blaming himself, the invaluable role of therapy, and the simple, powerful practice of watching the sunrise to find peace and perspective. This is an episode about acceptance, character-building, and the courage to take your fertility journey seriously from day one.

💬 Key Topics Discussed

The “ostrich moment” of delaying getting tested

The clinical and impersonal experience of providing a sample

Dealing with the emotional fallout of failed IVF cycles

The turning point of embracing vulnerability and authenticity

How therapy helped in processing self-blame

Finding peace and perspective through simple, mindful practices

🏁 Episode Sponsors

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📲 Connect & Follow

Join our community: nexysfertility.com

Subscribe on YouTube: The Male Fertility Podcast

Follow us on Instagram: @themalefertilitypodcast

Follow Ciaran: @themalefertilitypt

Follow Shaun: @knackered_knackers

Contact us: themalefertilitypodcast@gmail.com

🔍 Navigating Male Fertility

Looking for support and insight on male infertility? This podcast offers you stories, expert advice, and our NeXYs community ready to listen. Subscribe and follow to join the journey and never miss an episode.

⚠️ Disclaimer

This podcast provides information and support but should not replace professional medical advice. Always consult your healthcare provider for personalised care.

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About the Podcast

The Male Fertility Podcast
The UK’s leading podcast on male fertility. Real stories, expert advice, and the conversations men aren’t having.
The Male Fertility Podcast is the UK’s leading show dedicated to male fertility, hosted by Ciaran and Shaun, two men who’ve lived the reality of infertility diagnoses, fertility treatment, and everything that comes with it.

Whether you’re dealing with low sperm count, poor motility, low morphology, azoospermia, or a varicocele diagnosis, this podcast is the resource you wish you’d had from day one.

Each episode covers what actually matters: IVF and ICSI from the male perspective, navigating NHS referrals and waiting lists, the real cost of private treatment in the UK, lifestyle changes that can improve sperm quality, and the emotional and mental health impact that often goes unspoken.

We speak to fertility specialists, urologists, andrologists, and men sharing real, unfiltered stories — from difficult diagnoses through to successful pregnancies.

Topics we cover:

Male factor infertility: diagnosis and treatment options
Sperm health: count, motility, morphology, DNA fragmentation
IVF, ICSI, MESA, TESE, micro-TESE
Varicocele surgery and recovery
Supplements, diet, exercise, and lifestyle changes
Mental health, relationships, and coping strategies
NHS vs private fertility treatment in the UK
Costs, funding, and access to treatment
Supporting your partner
Real stories and success journeys

This podcast exists because male fertility is too often overlooked. Half of all infertility involves a male factor, yet most support is aimed elsewhere. We’re changing that.

If you’re facing fertility challenges, or supporting someone who is, subscribe now — you’re not alone.

About your host

Profile picture for Ciaran Hannington

Ciaran Hannington